Life with Migraines

If I'd had the forethought, there would be a video attached to this post.

I just did the most liberated, embarrassing, gleeful dance throughout my house.  There was also a little song that went along with it.  I can't recall entirely, but the lines, "My migraine's gone / and I feel so much better" were a recurring theme throughout the ditty.  Sure, there was absolutely no rhyme scheme, but the genuine joy behind the tune more than compensates for it... in my mind at least.

I'm not sure if the cat was terrified or amused, but he certainly was transfixed by the performance.

If you've ever had a migraine, you know this feeling.  Hell, even if you have a loved one or close friend that suffered from these buggers, you at the very least can relate to the immense relief that comes with the lifting of the debilitating pain.  Imagine a bunch of evil pixies in your head with teeny pickaxes trying to excavate your skull from the inside out.  That's what your loved one is going through.  A deleted scene from a tripped-out claymation horror movie.  In their skull.

...I'd like to take a moment to copyright that idea here and now.  I see it in anything I didn't get a hand in producing, I get a cut, yo.

And this demonic elf brain pain doesn't subside with experience or years.  Sure, a person learns to cope, learns what does and doesn't help the pain, avoids the known triggers.  But after twenty -- yes, twenty -- years of anywhere from 1 to 8 episodes a month, I can safely say that until a migraine fully subsides, I have trouble operating at anything higher than 75%... and even that's not a guarantee.  Basically, for rare opportunities or work, I'll push as hard as I can for normativity, but in general I resign myself to being a useless heap of cuddly (albiet whiny) pain.  For the protection of myself and others, this seems like the most logical course of action.

Like most female migraine sufferers, hormones do play a part in triggering my migraines.  At the risk of overshare, I can usually mark on a calendar when I'll at least have a half-migraine (basically the same amount of pain, but less sensitivity to light/sound, less nausea, and less general misery) for one to two days out of a month.  If I have more than two to three drinks, even if I wake up hangover-free, I awake with severe pain behind my right eye the following day.  IPAs and any overly hoppy beers are like potions of pain, and I avoid them accordingly.  Also, forgetting to eat regularly is a problem.  I don't intentionally skip meals, but sometimes time get away from me and before I know it, I've been running on fumes for too long and my head pretty much force quits the productivity programming on my life.

And, fellow migraine folks, back me up here, but I can wake up feeling perfectly fine and energetic, but still know, somewhere in my body and mind, that I will develop a migraine at some point during the day.  My stubborn ass will still refuse to treat is preemptively, though, so I end up with a headache that I'm forced to suffer through and/or treat later in the day.  Apparently, it's going to take twenty-one years before I break down and actually listen to my body.  This isn't so much idiocy as obstinance.

But, as for treatment... Being without health insurance, I'm not exactly able to take preventative medication.  Though I doubt I would given the opportunity -- I have taken both preventative and meds as well as meds used only when needed for an episode before and saw very little change in the frequency or severity of the pain.  Not to mention I hate the idea of taking non-essential medicine on a regular basis.

So, knowing that some folks are dealing with this same problem, I decided to make a short list of stuff that works for me.  Just keep in mind that I'm not a doctor by any stretch of the imagination, so any at-home remedies are based on my own experience -- I can't be held accountable if you hurt yourself or exacerbate your migraine doing any of these things.  Also, I have absolutely no money, so it'll be hilariously futile if you try to sue me.

• Go to a muscular skeletal therapist and get an adjustment. I prefer this to a chiropractor -- having my neck popped wigs me out. Pete Jurgensen in Martinsburg, WV is a great therapist if you're nearby.
• Go for a massage.  Nikole Bosley is a fantastic massage therapist in Charles Town, WV.  Tell her I sent you.
• Ice.  But not on your head.  The pain's usually not actively coming from there.  Try placing it on your upper neck or along the back or your head, near the base of your skull.  Alternate the ice with gentle pressure from your hand.  Don't hold the ice in place for more than a few seconds, and don't use it for a total time of more than a minute.
• Two words:  Jaw massage.  You have no idea how much jaw tension can contribute to migraine pain.  Theatre kids, use your training from voice class.  Everyone else, this is a handy intro.  However, I recommend relaxing your face a bit more and letting your jaw fall open if you're so inclined.  Yes, you'll feel like Cletus the Slackjawed Yokel with your mouth handing open, but trust me on this one.
• A massage from your partner.  They don't have to be a professional massage therapist, but the calming contact from someone you care about can be immensely comforting.  And yes, it can lead to...
• Sex.  Even if it only takes your mind off the pain for the duration of the act, it can be a relief.  Obviously, this hint is only if you're already sexually active.  Don't go losing your virginity under the auspices of curing your migraines.  
• Sleep.  Take a nap.  Go to bed early.  If you can swing at least an hour of sleep (preferably two or more if you can), that should make a huge difference.
• Get away from screens.  Put away your smartphone.  Close your laptop.  Turn off the telly.  Those backlights are gonna kill your eyes, head, and patience.  If anyone needs to get in touch with you urgently,  I'm sure they'll call you directly.  It won't kill you to unplug for a little while.  I promise.
• Caffeine.  Now, this is a controversial one.  I know lots of folks that say caffeine makes their headaches worse.  Not this gal.  Caffeine deprivation can also be a trigger for me, so I have one caffeinated beverage a day.  Except for migraine days.  Today alone, I took 2 Excderin Migraine (yes, that has caffeine in it) and had a glass and a half of Diet Coke.  I have a feeling all the stimulants had a lot do with my little dance number.

I know this isn't the most exciting blog post, but it was on my mind after I kicked the migraine that decided to take up residency in my skull this morning.  As much as I hope this info was helpful to anyone that can use it, I really hope nobody reading this needs it.  Because that means you get migraines too.  And I like you and don't want you to have these damned headaches.

Until next time.

Do You Ever Wake Up...

And realize you have a stellar idea for a new Food Network series?

No?  Just me?

Fine.

Anyone have the contact info for Scripps Networks' development department?

First!

Hrm.  Those douchey people that always type "first" in comment threads seem so satisfied with themselves.  This feels pretty much like a petty, empty victory.  Of course, I am doing it on my own blog, so there's very little competition to proclaim "First!" with such fervor.  That must be it.  Because people on the internet are always correct, well-meaning, and genuine.

Hi.  I'm Adrienne.  Odds are, if you're reading this first post, you likely already know me.  If you don't, then: Hi.  I'm Adrienne.

I swear, I don't always write like I've suffered a recent concussive trauma.  Or then again, maybe I do.  Maybe I do and nobody's told me!! Oh no!!

That's actually a very real fear that I thought I was a freak for having for a long time.  I had this weird paranoia that I'm actually not terribly bright or interesting, or that I have some severe and distracting tic or habit of which I am entirely unaware; and that my family and close friends somehow run interference ahead of me in social and professional situations.  They encourage the people I'm about to meet to be supportive and kind, so really everyone's just protecting me from myself.  That everything I've worked hard to achieve is a gesture of kindness on the part of relative strangers.

...If only the world were that altruistic.

I kept this paranoia to myself for a long time, until a childhood friend -- who has since joined the priesthood -- was giving me a ride to the airport this past summer.  The drive was long from Deep Creek, MD to Pittsburgh (yep, that's the nearest airport), so we found ourselves chatting about anything and everything as we traversed the highways in the grey of the early morning fog.  About halfway through the drive, my friend said that he always had a weird fear that he wasn't actually smart at all and that his family had convinced people to give him a shot.

It's strange to be so happy to hear someone divulge something like that, but I smiled immediately.  This intelligent, interesting, kind person that has devoted his life to the service of other people had the same concern as I did.   And later, I was telling Dan (for those of you that somehow don't know me, that's my fella), and he said he'd thought that as well.

So apparently it's completely normal to assume that we somehow are afraid we're overestimating ourselves?  That we stumbled into jobs, lives, and situations of which we're somehow unworthy due to the kindness and generosity of others?

Better than assuming the world should fall at our feet just because we exist.  I've seen that too, and while everyone's got their own journey through this life, I'd prefer to keep mine as far distanced from folks with an unjustified sense of entitlement as possible.  Not always easy in a large city, but still doable.

Anyway, where was I...?

Right!  Hi, I'm Adrienne.  I sometimes, but not often, introduce myself three times in a single blog posting.  I oscillate between living in West Virginia and New York City.  Being asked by people in either location if the other is a culture shock has gotten tiresome very quickly.  I have a kickass family, fantastic friends, and the best partner a gal could ask for.  My furry companion is a three-legged cat named Harris, though he stays with my family when I'm in NY to spare him the upheaval of moving back and forth.  I love writing, theatre, reading, baking, ziplining, thrifting, burlesque, dancing, teaching, and exploring the world around me.  I love a good laugh, but don't find racism, sexism, homophobia, transphobia, or jokes about violence at all amusing.

I loathe street harassment and more often than not will hollaback at idiots that participate in bothering women as they walk down the street --  When it's safe! Never do that when you're alone, it's dark, etc... always make sure you're not compromising your safety!.  But we need to do everything we can to make sure we don't let those assholes get away with taking your freedom to be a person in a public place!

I started this blog because I'm neck-deep in a crazy job search and am looking for a writing outlet that gives me more freedom than a cover letter.  I'm also currently writing a television pilot, but a girl needs a break from that too sometimes.  So who knows where this little website'll go in terms of subject matter.  But I plan to keep writing if you'll keep reading.  So if the numbers show up on my metric page, I'll make an effort to be interesting in your general direction on a regular basis.

Until next time.